A New Birth

My labor started on Friday night, November 12, 2010, around 11:30PM, irregular, easy contractions.  I timed them for a few hours but eventually gave up and went to bed.  The first night I slept, but as Saturday wore on, I got anxious for something to happen and was unable to sleep.  Sunday at 2:00AM, my contractions got more intense.  By 5:00AM we called our doula, Eva, who soon arrived and was a devoted and comforting presence during my labor.

Around 7:00AM our midwives arrived - all 5 of them!  Beth, Lynn, and 3 student midwives.  My fear this whole pregnancy was that I was going to have a huge baby - I felt huge the entire pregnancy and you should have heard the comments people made during my 3rd trimester, let alone as I went overdue.  Earlier in the week I'd had an ultrasound to check amniotic fluid levels and the ultrasound tech confirmed my fears by blurting out "this baby is measuring 10 lb. 6 oz."  I later learned that the ultrasound doctor called my midwife to recommend a c-section.  My midwife dismissed that, but brought extra support for my homebirth.  When I heard Beth was bringing her co-midwife, Lynn, along, I knew they were expecting a difficult delivery.

At 7:30AM Beth checked me and I was dilated to 2cm.  I was shocked.  I was 2cm at my appointment on Thursday, and I'd been having contractions for 32 hours, and they'd gotten more intense!  I thought it was the real thing.  But, no, Beth said I wasn't even in active labor.  I felt devastated.  She sent me on a walk and the midwives went out to breakfast.  I cried during my walk, stopping to close my eyes and brace myself during each contraction, aware of passersby walking to their churches.  Rich and Claire followed behind me.

I had planned on having Ketsy at the birth to take care of Claire.  Instead, Rich and Broc gave me a Priesthood blessing and Ketsy took Claire to church since we didn't know how long this was going to be.  During the blessing I remember Rich saying, "you'll give birth in the Lord's time", which made me wonder, "was I even going to have this baby today?"  And, couldn't Rich have blessed me to have an easy, pain-free birth?  Help a woman out!

I continued my birthing time using the ball and walking around.  By 9:30AM the midwives came back and after another hour spent laboring, Beth said I was 5cm.  Yay.  Time to get into the tub.

Ah, the glorious tub.  With Claire's birth I didn't have time to get in the tub, so I had high expectations of the birth tub.  The warm water did help a lot.  During my last trimester, I practiced Hypnobabies and it helped me handle the contractions with some grace.  I closed my eyes, breathed as deeply as I could, feeling my system slowing down, falling.  I told my body out loud, "Open, open, open, baby down, down, down, soften, soften, soften, relax, relax, relax, release, release, release.

I love these pictures of Rich and I.  He was always right there, confident in me, encouraging me, comforting me.  He was completely in the moment with me.  What love!

Around 11:30 I was dilated to 8 cm and the midwives suggested breaking my bulging water.  Unfortunately, that made my contractions more painful.  They checked my dilation right afterward and I had gone backwards - to 5 cm.  Again, I was totally devastated and now in real pain, so much that I couldn't figure out what I wanted to do next, so I got back in the tub.  By this time, my hypnosis wasn't working anymore to keep me calm.  Soon after I got into the tub I started to feel pushy.  I was still at 5 cm so they told me I couldn't push.  I tried to breathe all that energy out, but it wasn't working.  Instead, I was just writhing in the tub, trying to run away from the pain and back spasms, but there was no running away.  I was freaking out at every contraction.  Rich and Eva stayed with me and one of the student midwives locked eyes with me - her eyes were amazing.  Still I was having such a hard time with every contraction.  (There was also meconium when they broke my water and baby's heart rate had dipped.)  Beth said that considering my long sleepless labor and that he was a big baby, she wasn't sure I could do it.  I felt the exact same way.  I felt like I needed pain relief and a c-section to get him out.  So, at 12:15 she stepped away to make the call - we were transferring to the hospital.  Around this time, Ketsy and Claire came back from church into the intense situation and I told Ketsy, "just take her away, take her home with you".

I had a few more contractions in the tub, I went to the bathroom and had a few contractions right on top of each other in the bathroom, Beth checked me in there and I was still 5 cm, I went to my bedroom and had a few contractions in there.  Getting dressed seemed impossible and I had no idea how I was going to ride in the car to the hospital 20-30 minutes away.  In the bedroom my noises sounded deeper and more pushy, so Lynn suggested checking me again.  Beth checked me and then said, "Eileen, this next contraction I'm going to have you try pushing."  I didn't understand why she wanted me to push, I thought the baby would just get stuck and then how would I get to the hospital?  The next contraction I pushed.  I started standing up, but quickly fell against the bed so I was kneeling on the floor.  I pushed and pushed and pushed, with every breath I took, gasping in unimaginable pain.  I didn't know my pushes were doing anything until I heard Rich say, "his head is out, his head is out".  My son was born at home, 12 days late, after 37 hours of labor, on November 14, 2010 at 12:45pm, after 5 minutes of pushing!  Apparently, between the bathroom and the bedroom, in 10 minutes time, I dilated from 5 cm to 9 cm.  Then, as Beth told me to start pushing she was pulling a lip of cervix out of the way and I went from 9 cm to birth, in 5 minutes.  My first thoughts were, "I alive, I can't believe I'm alive" as I tried to catch my breath and recover.  Baby was born behind me and it took a minute for him to start crying.  I first saw him when Beth passed him under my legs and I held his warm, wet, soft, curled up body against my stomach.  He was beautiful!!!  And ONLY 9 lb. 2 oz.  Wow!

I'm so grateful for everyone who helped me survive and get baby here safely: Baby Boy, Rich, Claire, Eva, Ketsy, Beth, Lynn, Jamie, Cassandra, and Megan.  For Lynn and Eva, who took beautiful photos.  And, most importantly my Heavenly Parents, who watched over me with Love and Blessings.

Last Moments as a Family of Three

A gorgeous evening walk along the beach.

Claire is already a sweet big sister.  Thank new baby boy for every one of those stretch marks, I had none with Claire.  ~Sigh~

College Roomies

I was lucky to have a visit from my BYU roommate Laurie. Oh, I miss her! She lives in Minnesota and we've managed to see each other a handful of times since college. Her speeding (and getting a ticket) to my South Dakota wedding reception, me taking a nasty $10 Chinatown bus from NYC to Boston to visit them while her husband was going to MIT, me visiting her near Minneapolis on my way through to South Dakota, and now her coming to Seattle on her husband's business trip.  We only had a few hours for a visit so we entertained our kids (so we could talk) by taking them to the Children's Science Museum and the Seattle Center fountain.  We had a great time catching up and we seriously need to do it more often.  It's strange to be together so rarely because our lives are so different from when we met - having 4 kids running around and each pregnant with our next.   

October 2010

Claire had fun being girly in October. 

The perks of making Daddy's birthday cake.

Rich turned 39.  Sounds Crazy!

My little Ladybug.  Our friends, Dave & Alyce, took Claire to the church Halloween Party while we stayed home sick.  We were surprised she went willingly and we heard she had a great time, even talking to people!

I like to dress up in my swimsuit with a sweater underneath too.

The Winter Tried to Kill Me

October began a period of months of illness in our family.  I think the final tally was:

Eileen - 9 times.  Usually colds, but I developed bronchitis which made me cough literally hundreds of times a day.  It got worse at night and you know how often a pregnant woman gets up to go to the bathroom at night.  Once, I got up and just in the bathroom and getting back to bed I coughed over 70 times.  Imagine the strain on a pregnant belly - it felt like my ribs had been fractured from the coughing.  Add in there a frustrating trip to the Emergency Room a few days before my due date, a few rounds of antibiotics, acupuncture, Chinese medicinal tea, being 12 days overdue.  UGH.  The colds reappeared throughout my sleep-deprived postpartum recovery.  Add to the postpartum recovery: Healing from tears/stitches, along with Physical Therapy, Massage Therapy, and Chiropractic for bony pain when sitting and we're talking about a lot of Dr. appointments.

Rich - 1 time with a lingering month long cough

Claire - 4 times, including an ear infection

New Baby - 2 times, including bronchiolitis which required a trip to Urgent Care and an inhaler, as well as a broken clavicle from the birth, which required a few trips to Seattle Children's for x-rays and follow-up.  Poor new baby!

WINTER WAS HARD.

What would we do without the Relief Society sisters' willingness to help us?  We were brought dozens of meals (most women signed up a few times to bring us meals and all of the meals included enough food for leftovers), my kids were sent to playdates so I could nap or go to Dr. appointments, Claire was taken to church on Sunday, to a Halloween Party, and our new family of 4 was invited to Alyce and Dave E.'s house for a Thanksgiving feast.  I feel like it's impossible to express how much all of this help meant to us.  I hope I've included everyone's names here!  THANK YOU, my friends!

Meals and baked goods: Amy B., Sara B., Amanda T., Annie B., Nancy B., Alyce E., Eva C., Mel G., Janis W., and Jennifer B., Candy W., Jennifer M., Jessica P., Tara H., Marsha M., and Jo S.

Childcare: Sara B., Amy B., Amanda T., Ketsy H., Eva C., Alyce E., and Mindy P.

I also was brought meals from my dance friends: Christine W., Shannon B., and Amy S.

Luckily, Rich worked from home several days here and there to give me a break, as well as taking a 2-week paternity leave.  He also often watched the kids at his office while I went to physical therapy.  Unluckily, Claire quickly became a little TV addict while Mommy rested.

Luckily, Winter passed and our Health returned.  Writing all of this out I'm truly amazed that we pulled through and I'm truly amazed at the outpouring of concern and care given to us.  Heavenly Father is mindful of me and my family.  He inspires people to reach out and gives them extra energy to fulfill their personal responsibilities and to help others.  He heals.  He answers prayers.  He loves us.  Beautiful!

October 2010

I took Rich to the Free First Thursdays Experience Music Project

We drove the scenic Mountain Highway Loop to see the Fall Leaves.

 

Aunt Lorraine and Uncle Seth visit

In October, my Aunt Lorraine and Uncle Seth took a train from Minnesota through Canada to come visit us.  I lived with them my Senior year of high school and it was WONDERFUL to spend time together again.

Seth gave us a tour of the planes at the Boeing Museum of Flight.  As a WWII pilot, he flew several models of the displayed planes.  He reminisced about landing one of the planes in such a powerful headwind, that the plane was actually travelling backwards!

The stoic look on Seth's face here speaks volumes.  He is haunted by his participation in bombing missions, twice his plane was shot down, and he survived on a South Pacific island for 19 days completely alone.  He was shot at again while driving a vehicle and sustained a crash that shattered his pelvis in 17 places, among other things.  These experiences have all left their mark on him.

 

I always thought of Seth as a gruff, old man, whose genius intellect was quite intimidating, and who for as long as I can remember, has talked about his impending death.  This trip I definitely saw his softer side.  He still says any day now he's going to die and this time his frailty suggests it could be true.  He got teary-eyed saying good-bye to me, which of course got me misty-eyed, as I thought of his gesture of taking me into his home many years ago.  Seth is now 89 and Lorraine is 25 years his junior.  They have raised his, hers, and ours children.  Their twin boys, Martin and Bevan, have finished college and Bevan moved out of the house in the Fall of 2010.  They are finally empty nesters!  Seth shared with Rich that for all but 1 year when Dara studied abroad in Germany, he's had children in his home for 65 years and "he's loved every minute of it."  Truly a softer side!  And the thought again makes me want to cry.

I enjoy taking my art-loving family to the Olympic Sculpture Park.

One of Lorraine's many careers is a teacher.  She always gets down on the level of the child.  She is an amazing communicator and she indulges children in their very important games and conversations.  Children LOVE her.  She also suggested tons of things I can do at home to engage and teach Claire.    

Lorraine filled a critical role in my life as she freely and patiently gave me so much of her attention.  Attention equals Love.

Baby Shower

I was showered with Baby Love with a party thrown by my friends Amy, Ketsy, and Jill.  I have so much support from the women here at church.  I am so blessed!!!

Amy and Nancy

Jennifer and Janelle

Sandy and Janet

Amanda and Tara

Ketsy and I - it's been so fun to be pregnant together.

The sly photographer.

Jill's amazing diaper cake with so many goodies: socks, baby spoons, toothbrush, toy cars, washcloths, baby baseball, teething toy, a binkie, and a real hydrangea on top.

I was given so many adorable outfits, books, a Dr. Seuss drawing, a soft blankie, big-sister gifts, the list goes on.  I've had women pass me gifts at church or stop by my house with more surprises.  People are so generous!

I sent this picture to my family to update them on my pregnant status.  My grandpa's hilarious response was only two sentences: "OH MY.  When is this supposed to end?"  That was exactly my thought the entire pregnancy.  Keep in mind, this is me at almost 36 weeks.  I finally gave birth more than 6 weeks after this picture was taken!